I went out to this restaurant not long ago and met the waitress of my dreams. About halfway through dinner I noticed my baked potato had big brown spots going all the way through. So I called the waitress over and said, "Ma'am, this potato is bad."

She nodded, picked up the potato, and smacked it. Then she put it back on my plate and said, "Sir, if that potato causes any more trouble, you just let me know."