Some of us keep hearing about marketing. Well, here is a brief, albeit sick, description of marketing concepts in terms we can understand.

In understanding the different marketing concepts, we'll provide some background information. Let's say you and your buddies (you're male, by the way) are going to a party. While at the party, you spot a very lovely lady. Here are the different scenarious and their associated types of marketing :

• You walk up to her and state, "I'm fantastic in bed". This is Direct Marketing.
• One of your friends walks over to her, and states that "My friend over there is fantastic in bed". This is called Advertising.
• You walk over to her and obtain her phone number. The next evening, you call her and tell her "I'm fantastic in bed". This is called Telemarketing.
• She straightens her dress. She walks up to you and pours you a drink. She says, "May I," and reachs up to straighten your tie, brushing her breast lightly against your arm, and then she says, "By the way, I'm fantastic in bed". She has Public Relations.
• She walks up to you and states, "I hear you're fantastic in bed". That is called Brand Recognition.
• She is making eyes at you. She walks up to start a conversation, but you end up talking her into going home with your buddy, who just happens to be ugly. This is called Sales Representation.
• She calls you later that night stating that your buddy can't satisfy her. This is called Technical Support.
• You are still on your way to this party, and you realize that there could be hundreds of good looking daughters in all the houses you are passing. So, you stop, climb onto one of the houses, and shout at the top of your lungs, "I'm fantastic in bed!" This is called Junk Mail.