I worked forty-five years for someone else So that I could retire.
I dreamed of sleeping late And sitting by the fire.
I dreamed of long vacations, Enjoying stage and song.
But, let me set you straight on that concept, It is simply wrong.
This Retirement bit has a mind of it's own And this is how it goes.
I poured concrete on my alarm clock But, I still wake up at four.
I get my eyes checked on Monday. Wife gets hers checked the next day.
I go for a colon check on Wednesday And pass my wife going the other way.
I have a dental appointment on Thursday. Wife goes for a test on her heart.
Friday we go get prescriptions filled And browse around at Walmart.
Saturdays we just stay home And try to get the paper work right.
We can't take any overnight trips Cause we can't see to drive at night.
Restroom confusion keeps us out of church on Sunday And we really do hate that.
There's nothing wrong with the restrooms, We just can't remember where they're at.
We don't need to plan next week, Just make sure we can drive.
And not forget where the hospitals and clinics are. We'll need them to survive.
Once a week we visit the cemetery And it seems more like home each time we go.
I look around at the headstones And see everyone I know.
So, don't build your castles too high, my friend, While strolling through the clover.
This is a typical week in retirement And on Monday we start all over!